A gender-balanced post?

So, here I am thinking about the best form of asking a question without offending anyone. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ™ˆ

Back in the days, one could easily get away with the question “Why get pregnant for a man you wouldn’t want to marry?

But lately, a question like that could land one into trouble, irrespective of whether you wanted to direct the question to a particular gender, that is the female gender.

Most feminists would prefer or insist on the question rather asked as: “Why impregnate a woman who wouldn’t want to marry you or you wouldn’t want to marry?

It’s probably the same question, or the import of the message might be same, but depending on the particular gender the message is directed to, it admittedly creates a totally different feel.

Sometimes our writer’s block does not stem from not having an idea or issue to write about. Sometimes it’s just the growing struggle to put on a gender-balanced lens so no gender gets pissed just because you said or wrote something directed at only one gender. Reality is that, many times, a topic or issue so simple to communicate becomes more difficult to put out just because of the need to use he/she or him/her. ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ™ˆ

ยฉMark Gadogbe, 2021

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4 thoughts on “A gender-balanced post?

  1. Hi!! Itโ€™s actually a great question! I have two children by a man that I was with for 9 years and was not married to. Why? I was young, immature and I thought that eventually he would see that I was a great mother and person and want to marry me. It sounds crazy now, almost 12 years later but at the time for me it made sense. I loved him, and we loved our children so for me marriage wasnโ€™t important enough to have before giving him children. Now, I am a single mother, heโ€™s a good dad but I wish things were different between us. Ideally, I would want to raise my children in the home with their father. Heโ€™s now engaged to a woman he doesnโ€™t have children with and he proposed in less then a year. Today, I would not have a child with a man that I was not married to. It was a lesson learned!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks a lot for sharing your life story, Angelina. Really appreciate you opening up about it. I can imagine how it feels and really lost for words. So sorry this had to happen to you.


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