Emotional attachment is important for building healthy and committed love relationships but can also be a very costly thing.
You build your life around one person (your partner) for years and suddenly they decide to leave or move away…to pursue new dreams, goals, aspirations and better their life – and hopefully, both of your lives. A difficult choice is made that leaves little room for making changes or compromises that includes you. You understand, but then you also realize that dreams of a better future have taken first place over you. You have to relearn to build life alone and apart, while realizing distance has a way of shattering bonds – both physical and emotional.
You realize that if you fall in love with a bird, you have to let it fly…you must not take away its wings. You must not cage a bird for its happiness depends on flying. If you’re married to a fish, you must let it swim.
You also realize that, much as you may desire it, life cannot always be lived together with a significant other. There are times you will be together, there are times you will be apart. Just that if you are high on emotional attachment, no matter how brief or long the parting away is, no matter the good reasons and future rewards, and no matter how often you try to stay in touch, something leaves you, a big part of you dies within, your emotional attachment bubble bursts…you feel a vacuum left. Everything changes…until you’re back to building life together again. If nothing changes, then you’re not that emotionally attached.
©Mark Gadogbe, 2022
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In the wake of Corona Virus, everything has changed across the globe, including Church services, doctrines and the likes. These few random thoughts have been crossing my own mind lately.
They used to castigate those who worship from home via TV and online platforms as not being Christians after all. Christians are only those planted in a Church and never miss Church, blah, blah, blah. Hope we are asking ourselves how Christian we all are now being at home and doing Church online?
They used to take pride in preaching in or to huge congregations. See how awkward it is now to be preaching to empty chairs and nobody standing up to clap for you or give you needless fans? Hope those your many body guards who don’t want anybody nearing their revered men of God are still at post protecting you in an empty Church? Hope some men of God have started learning again how to carry their own Bibles to the pulpit? Hope some wives of men of God can now have some true happiness and not have to fake in Church pretending to be happy with their husbands never sitting at home in the name of doing God’s work?
Oh how they used to take for granted church members who leave everything they have to come sit and listen to the word of God preached. Then, there are those haughty ushers who think they are the best of human beings God has created just because they are privileged to direct people to their sit. Will you now go and direct empty seats or you will direct people online? Hope we’re all learning now that everybody matters.
And oh, now that it is communion service, I hope it is okay now and acceptable to use shortbread, pie, fruit juices, just anything we find in our fridges to represent the communion bread or wafer and communion wine? Should it matter now, or should we still argue about which Church is doing it the right way or not?
Hope a lot of our ‘stupid’ doctrines, practices and attitudes in Church are giving way in these few days and we can enjoy some sanity from the confines of our rooms, as we all pray, read the Bible ourselves and build our personal relationship with God?
May God help us all come out of this global storm and be better people and believers.
©Mark Gadogbe, 2020
“Woman, you see, is an object of such a kind that study it as much as you will, it is always quite new.”
— Leo Nikolaevich Tolstoy