Life does not always give what we want

​We all have had our share of ups and downs.

A million unanswered prayers, constant failures, unmet dreams, plans falling apart, feeling depressed and feeling not good enough for people, sicknesses that will never leave and you know it’s just a matter of time and you will say goodbye, people causing us pain, people treating you like garbage, having a smile on your face but with a broken heart inside…just losing it and not having a grip on life

You feel God’s being unfair, totally silent and unresponsive. You can’t help but to blame God… what kind of a Father sees a child’s pain and doesn’t act?

But then, can a loving father always save his child from every shit? Can you always be there for your child? No matter how much you wish to, can you always save your child from the grips of the Law? 

Why trust an Omnipotent God who can’t save you from every shit? 

Maybe same way we will fail to meet our own child’s every need no matter how much we try…Maybe same way the Omnipotent is unresponsive sometimes?

Maybe it’s because the Examiner is always silent during the test! And no matter how hard the test is, you have to figure out the answers yourself! 

Maybe there are some things He leaves to us to battle on our own and claim our own victories over. 

Maybe the strength and wisdom to carry on He will supply… But the battle we must fight ourselves till our last breathe. 

Giving up is not an option God desires for you, but your choice to give up is not a guarantee that He will step in. 

If you chose to hang yourself over a problem, He will not always come running to cut off the ropes. 

Life is hard, so many things will not go well and would have nothing to do with God not loving you or cursing you. We just have to keep at it, keep pushing, keep fighting and keep getting up if we get knocked down…if we are are gonna win! 

As for self-pity in the face of trials, it never gets us anywhere. 

May it be well with our soul! 
(c) Mark Gadogbe (McApple) 

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A matchless love…

What manner of love can this be?

A love as strong as death,

A love as mighty as the Lion of the tribe of Judah,

A love that endureth the trials of a cross,

A love that endureth the torment of a shameful death,

A love that bears all iniquities,

A love that despises every shame,

A love that is glorified over all,

Surely it is my Beloved’s love,

Yes, my Beloved,

The incomparable lover of my soul,

Yes, my Beloved,

Who fans aflame His love in my heart,

And excites the ardour of my spirit,

Never such love like my Beloved’s,

That excites emotions within,

And turns my weaknesses into strengths,

Never such love like my Beloved’s,

In whose light I discover my ungratefulness,

And in whose touch I am made anew.

 

© Mark Gadogbe (McApple)

Image source:
www.logomoose.com

Marriage Rut…

“It is rare to find a couple as madly in love with each other as they were when they were dating. Most marriages have fallen into a routine; a boring, lifeless and discouraging routine. If you have kids, then it seems to be even harder to find time to connect with your spouse”

Image source:
www.peculiarwife.com

 

A new woman

I was a distant admirer

My eyes liking what they saw

The beautiful personality of a simple lady

So simple in all respects

Circumspect in choice of friends

Godly in character and dressing

Her chasteness so alluringly satisfying to me

I wished I could get closer

To experience her Godly ambience

But these now are mere ruminations of the past

For a new woman now I see

A totally changed personality

Running down an ungodly road

The road of conscious self exposure

A new love found in garments so scanty and revealing

My eyes lost all admirations

Having suffered a thousand “negative externalities”

From her now ungodly self exhibitions

Casting off her “breastplate of righteousness”

And parading her nakedness

To the displeasure of God and Godly men

But the pleasure of worldly men

To some, a shame to womanhood

To others, a good display of woman empowerment

I wondered what went wrong

 

© Mark Gadogbe (McApple)

 

Image source:
dailybiblememe.com

 

 

Does he/she feel the same about you?

I have discovered the above question is one of the most vital people in serious relationships or considering marriage should ask themselves and their partners. And please when you do, I pray thee that you don’t make it a mere emotional question.

Does he/she love you as much as you do?? Will they go the extra miles with you?

 

Image source:
quotesgram.com

 

 

#MarriageGoals #Johannesburg

“It is important for marriages to create lasting fun memories”

Joburg was fun and worth every penny!

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City Tour
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Apartheid Museum
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The face you make when heading to Carlton Centre, tallest office building in Africa
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Gold Reef City
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Nelson Mandela’s house
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Inside Mandela’s House
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Mandela’s Living Room
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2010 World Cup Soccer City Stadium (The Calabash)
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June 16 Memorial Acre
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Memorial Acre
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The famous SOWETO
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To Desmond Tutu’s House
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Orlando Towers, World’s Highest SCAD Freefall
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Orlando Towers Bungee Jump
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Braai Time…Have me some BBQ
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A pose in our lorry tire goalpost…after volley and football session
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Ice cream fight
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Gold Reef City Anaconda Roller Coaster Ride Entrance
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The Anaconda!
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The Anaconda in motion
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A shot before embarking on the Anaconda Ride @ Gold Reef City Theme Park
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The Gold Reef City UFO Ride
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The friendly lion…lol

…And then the face you get in the Tower of Terror! “It sure was too late to cry for your mama”!

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Gold Reef City Tower of Terror Roller Coaster Ride

Mark Gadogbe (McApple)

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Weddings

Many are ready for the wedding but not the sacrifices that come with marriage. All their preparations have been for the wedding ceremony…not for the journey of marriage.

The only times they have read or devoted serious attention to anything related to marriage was when they were planning the wedding. And if they be Christians, then the only times they have had marital counsel was during their premarital counseling or those rare times short marriage sermons came from the Church pulpit. Beyond these, they would have made no further efforts on their own to read, learn and acquire marital knowledge.

Preparations for a wedding and preparations for marriage are two different things, or are they not? One ends but one continues throughout the length of your lives together, or it’s not so? How can any serious business like marriage survive without good preparation and continuous acquisition of related knowledge? Or don’t they say to be forewarned is to be forearmed?

Yesterday I visited a family friend whose marriage had broken way before mine started. She’s way older than me. Apparently, I had once shared some marriage truths or knowledge with her and gave her some materials, videos, movies, etc. At a point in our conversations, she said something to the effect that she wished she had all those materials and information I gave her when she was still in her marriage and that all that knowledge that she has now would have helped her save her marriage. She bemoaned her ignorance at the time. I was sad for her but was still grateful for her comment.

She made me realize that knowledge is everything and that timing is important. Knowledge at the right time is powerful and life saving.

Nonetheless we are human and cannot know everything. And even if we do know everything, and have applied all that we know, we still have flaws and cannot save everything, marriage included (a failing relationship/marriage can only be saved when the two parties are willing). That’s where God’s super-duper Grace comes in! Grace…we all need it, for in the end, though knowledge be important, it’s not all about knowledge.

God help us and our marriages that we will not live life with a belly full of regrets!

Mark Gadogbe (McApple)

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Image sources:
www.deviantart.com

 

A LETTER TO MY UNBORN SON

Dear Son,
I know by the time you will be reading this letter on your hologram phone you will be laughing at Facebook and wondering why your grandfather’s son chose this slow medium .
For your information this is amongst the fastest messaging technologies of my time. The hologram phone is still at the conceptual stage .

I believe however that by the time you will be here it would become a reality. After all, I remember growing up when there were no emails, internet, Facebook, et al. We used to buy airmails and write to “pen pals” abroad. We waited for weeks to get our responses or in some cases RETURNED LETTERS due to one or two spelling mistakes in the addresses .
We had a full session dedicated at our morning assemblies in school to the sharing of mails received.

The heroes were those who received fat mails regularly.
The content of these mails were usually Bibles, magazines, tracts and audio cassettes. Hmmm, many youth today do not even know how an audio cassette looks like let alone how to use it. I still have a few and I would keep them for you to have a look.
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I remember how we zealously and jealously guard our address books to prevent others from copying from them. In some cases we mischievously alter the numbers in the addresses so that those who secretly copy them would receive RETURNED LETTERS.
Son, those were very interesting times but I know you would find it boring. Anyway, my main reason for writing this letter to you is not to talk about my childhood days. I would dedicate another letter to that later.
I want you to be careful about the kind of women you let into your life. Do not be distracted by physical beauty. I am certain cosmetic surgery would have reached insane levels at your time cos even now men are able to undergo sex change surgery to become women. One of the essential questions you would have to ask a ‘woman’ you like in your era should be: “Were you born a woman?’
After you have established the baseline that she is really a she, please look beyond her looks.Get a good woman just like your mom. If I want to describe her now this letter would be too long so I would do so in another letter. Having a pretty looking woman is good, after all, your mom is pretty but it should not be the basis of your choice.
Fred Amese
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Pray, then Decide and Act

There are some things that God will not come down from Heaven to solve for us, no matter how much we pray or cry foul about Him not changing our situations. He’s left those things in the freewill He gave man and until you sit down, evaluate, decide and act, nothing will change. The best He will do for you is to give you wisdom in knowing what and what not to do about the situation.

Bad things happen to good people. Terrible things happen to committed Christians…God allows it all. If you think you are a good Christian and so only good things should come your way, you will continue to have issues with God. It’s just natural order! And whether you give up on God or not will not change who God is or stop bad things from happening to good people. Pray all you can, but after praying you will still have to act! And the more you delay a decision that will free your life and give you the peace you need, the more weightier the burden gets.

The decisions we fail to make today, the changes we fail to make today, we will make tomorrow or years later. What you don’t deal with today, you will deal with tomorrow. That’s not to say make rash or irrational decisions but what’s true is that there is a connection between decision-making and destiny; though both are two different things. Poor decisions can affect your destiny big time…and you don’t blame God for it! Though He’s well able to change and re-orient destinies, you may have suffered some things for your bad decisions which may not change. Even after the situation changes, those scars will remain to remind you of your bad decisions or the decisions you refused to make.

When it comes to marriage too, God has stopped putting men to sleep and forming their partners from their ribs. There is a lot of freewill and decision-making involved in choosing a marriage partner. God will only be there to guide you to the right partner and to bless your union.

Sometimes I am tempted to believe that even when you choose a wrong partner and bring him/her to God to be solemnized in marriage, God will still “bless” that union. But as to whether things will work out well in the end between you two depends on you. That is how important choice and decision is! That’s why not everybody God brings your way that looks good and sexy that you should make a wife/husband out of. But when you do, He will still “bless” it anyways, I guess. The best He will do when you want to settle with the wrong person He doesn’t approve of is to bring into the relationship as many red flags as there are for you to see them and make the right decision. But again, sometimes that is even when we begin to get unhappy with God for bringing too many problems in our relationships and not making it to work according to our will.

Marriage decisions are very important; it can make or unmake a person’s destiny. And it is all the more important because God is not a fan of divorce. God is still in the marriage miracle business. He’s still in the match-making business. He’s still leading people to right partners and He’s still bringing right partners people’s way. But He’s not making decisions for them; He’s letting them make their own decisions! And whether you make the right decision or not, His promise of never forsaking you and being with you till the very end of the age (or that situation you committed yourself to) still holds.

May we find grace to make the right decisions always! And as we do, may we find grace to not lean on our own understanding but seek wholehearted guidance from God.

Mark Gadogbe (McApple)

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The experience and expectations of LOVE

True love, real love, genuine love….whatever!

Sometimes the problem is that many times the only definition and experience we (Christians) want to have of love is the 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 kind:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

It’s not a bad thing to want to experience this kind of love. Of course that is the ideal thing; that’s the best (Christian) model of love and what everybody desires.

But what we often fail to realize, I think, is that in reality or field of practice, the fact of the matter is that love (and the person loving you) will not always be kind, will not always be patient, will not always trust, will not always hope, etc. Sometimes or many times, love (and the person loving you) actually causes pain, hurts, disappointments, heartbreaks, etc and then we begin to ask if this love is genuine, real, true, the God-kind, etc.

When expectations of love are raised so high, when we get obsessed with experiencing at all cost what’s ideal…we often risk many things and could possibly be living out a “lie” and we could become our own enemies.

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Is it not William Shakespeare who said “expectation is the root of all heartache”? And is it not Pushkaraj Shirke who said “love doesn’t hurt. Expectations do”?

There’s nothing wrong with wanting a love that’s perfect; often it’s just a rare commodity!

unrealistic-expectations

Cheers!

Mark Gadogbe (McApple)

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http://www.motionworkspt.com/content/expectations

How High Expectations Can Ruin Relationships