“At the heart of humankind’s existence is the desire to be intimate and to be loved by another. Marriage is designed to meet that need for intimacy and love. That is why the ancient biblical writings spoke of the husband and wife becoming “one flesh.” That did not mean that individuals would lose their identity; it meant that they would enter into each other’s lives in a deep and intimate way”.
~~Dr. Gary Chapman
I guess the sexy churchy girl balance is very important when it comes to marriages and/or relationships. Most men, I guess, want a good balance between holy and sexy; they want their woman’s ‘bad girl’ game to be just as good as her holiness game. Obviously, a woman’s sex appeal must be top notch to continually attract her man. Men want the good girl and the bad chick, all in one package.
Somehow, a woman must be a bit of a ‘bad girl’ and a ‘church girl’ to be perfectly right for a man. Women who switch both roles perfectly well are great at keeping their men and their home. Women who downplay physical attraction often lose out because the rare truth is that, it is mostly hard for a man to feel a sexual or romantic connection with a woman he is not physically attracted to. That is why a woman must invest in always looking attractive and appealing to her man; she must invest in everything that makes a woman look and be sexy.
A man would crave a bit of the ‘bad girl’ when all a woman offers is too much of the ‘good girl’ character. When it’s all too religious, it gets boring. Obviously, that must be the real reasons why I lot of christian sex books had to be written to at least teach church girls how to be sexy, act horny, play a little ‘dirty’, spice things up and have great sex? Godliness is of course a great gain, but a woman must not only learn how to be a prayer warrior.
Similarly, the ‘good girl’ will be most desired when all a man gets is the ‘bad girl’ stuff. Too much of everything is obviously bad, right? That good balance of a good girl bad girl trait is absolutely a winner with men.
The reverse is also true, just so we don’t put it all on the women. Women also want a good balance of the playboy and church boy traits in their men.
Obviously it’s all about times and seasons, knowing when to be churchy and when not to be, right? 😊
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©Mark Gadogbe, 2020
Lust and love…
I sometimes don’t even know the difference
When I can’t get you off my mind
Is it love I am feeling or lust
When all I want is to make love to you and hold you close to me
Is it still love I am feeling or lust
Or is it love only when you’re married and lust when you’re not?
The feelings sometimes feel same
Like love sure coexists with lust
Maybe that’s only true in marriage
But I see lust in true love many times
So much lust between partners for the object of their love
Not people they have a fling with, but people they truly love and will die for
Then I become confused and I conclude
Maybe love lusts too. Maybe it does!
©Mark Gadogbe (Kobby McGad), 2018
“The best kind of sex in marriage is when a husband is cherishing his wife and the wife is cherishing her husband. Sex affirms each other’s beauty, worth and desirability. Neurologically, the more you have sex with each other, the more you desire each other and the less attractive other women become. This is basic brain chemistry”~~Gary Thomas