​My Chemist wife…

One of the joys of being married to my wife is how her field or career in Chemistry fascinates a “layman” like me and gets me cracking up many times. The intelligence is just far beyond my small brain! 

When she was doing her undergraduate thesis in computational quantum chemistry, I never understood anything, right from her research topic to her findings. The topic got reshaped a few times but I think the final topic was something like “Density Functional Theory Study of the Mechanism of Oxidation of Ethylene by Tungstyl Chloride“. No matter how many times she tried to explain her research work to me, the end result will be me shaking my head in disbelief at the “wonders she is cooking up“. Sometimes it gets her angry, other times it gets us both laughing hysterically. 

In my attempt to see in reality what she was up to, I once visited her in the Computation Lab but all I saw was some “dancing molecules” on the computer screen. Since then, “dancing molecules” became a term that gets us both cracking up. 

Similarly, during her masters research, one of the funniest experiences I get is when I’m talking to people about her and they ask me what research she is working on or what her research topic is. 

But how can I possibly keep a topic like “Synthesis and characterization of (pyrazolylphosphinite)nickel(II) and palladium(II) complexes and their catalytic activity towards olefin oligomerization” in mind, or just by looking at the topic have the slightest idea what the research is about? My only way of escape is to say she is doing something in the inorganic field that involves catalysis. Haha. 

When I first saw her topic and one of her many ChemDraw® chemical structures that literally gave me headache because I couldn’t understand what in the world it is, I immediately understood why she spends all those “ungodly hours” unreachable in the Lab. 

And I must confess, I tried a couple of times to read her entire thesis with hope that I will understand something but the only pages I understood were the “Dedication” and “Acknowledgement” pages. Those were the only pages written for layman’s understanding. Perhaps it’s also because something caught my eyes on that page that lighted them up to see clearer than before? 😂 

That is, I could not imagine how a whole thesis that I do not understand gets dedicated to “me myself and I“.

But well, I guess that’s one of the best things about marriage: once you marry, almost every major achievement, accomplishment, or milestone gets dedicated to you. Haha. Hope that encourages somebody to get married soon. 😂😜

The confidence that Chemistry gives my wife knows no bounds. With it, at least she’s been able to at one point in her life convince her sisters into believing that she can prepare concoctions from almost anything. 😂 😂 Who wouldn’t believe that, when a day never ends without you hearing “I’m going to the lab to prepare some reactions“? 

Well, Chemistry must be a field for those with higher brains (can’t believe I just indirectly implied my wife is smarter than me 😜). Well, she’s very brilliant, that’s for sure, and I can see her doing many amazing things in the future! And from her we’ve learned that anything is possible in life once you have the almighty Chemistry and Jesus in your boat. Init? 😉

As I write this post I’m reminded today marks 7 years since I started out on this love journey with a very naive chemistry student at the time. Cheers to you Julia McGad for balancing my “chemical equations” so well! I look forward to the PhD (Doctorate) experience 😉.


(PS: This post is also to encourage and pledge support for all the amazing women (“beauties with brains”) in the STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics) fields to keep pushing to greater heights 💪👏😍)

©Mark Gadogbe (McApple), 2017

Weddings

Many are ready for the wedding but not the sacrifices that come with marriage. All their preparations have been for the wedding ceremony…not for the journey of marriage.

The only times they have read or devoted serious attention to anything related to marriage was when they were planning the wedding. And if they be Christians, then the only times they have had marital counsel was during their premarital counseling or those rare times short marriage sermons came from the Church pulpit. Beyond these, they would have made no further efforts on their own to read, learn and acquire marital knowledge.

Preparations for a wedding and preparations for marriage are two different things, or are they not? One ends but one continues throughout the length of your lives together, or it’s not so? How can any serious business like marriage survive without good preparation and continuous acquisition of related knowledge? Or don’t they say to be forewarned is to be forearmed?

Yesterday I visited a family friend whose marriage had broken way before mine started. She’s way older than me. Apparently, I had once shared some marriage truths or knowledge with her and gave her some materials, videos, movies, etc. At a point in our conversations, she said something to the effect that she wished she had all those materials and information I gave her when she was still in her marriage and that all that knowledge that she has now would have helped her save her marriage. She bemoaned her ignorance at the time. I was sad for her but was still grateful for her comment.

She made me realize that knowledge is everything and that timing is important. Knowledge at the right time is powerful and life saving.

Nonetheless we are human and cannot know everything. And even if we do know everything, and have applied all that we know, we still have flaws and cannot save everything, marriage included (a failing relationship/marriage can only be saved when the two parties are willing). That’s where God’s super-duper Grace comes in! Grace…we all need it, for in the end, though knowledge be important, it’s not all about knowledge.

God help us and our marriages that we will not live life with a belly full of regrets!

Mark Gadogbe (McApple)

PS: Like, Comment, Share, and…Subscribe!

Image sources:
www.deviantart.com