Many are ready for the wedding but not the sacrifices that come with marriage. All their preparations have been for the wedding ceremony…not for the journey of marriage.
The only times they have read or devoted serious attention to anything related to marriage was when they were planning the wedding. And if they be Christians, then the only times they have had marital counsel was during their premarital counseling or those rare times short marriage sermons came from the Church pulpit. Beyond these, they would have made no further efforts on their own to read, learn and acquire marital knowledge.
Preparations for a wedding and preparations for marriage are two different things, or are they not? One ends but one continues throughout the length of your lives together, or it’s not so? How can any serious business like marriage survive without good preparation and continuous acquisition of related knowledge? Or don’t they say to be forewarned is to be forearmed?
Yesterday I visited a family friend whose marriage had broken way before mine started. She’s way older than me. Apparently, I had once shared some marriage truths or knowledge with her and gave her some materials, videos, movies, etc. At a point in our conversations, she said something to the effect that she wished she had all those materials and information I gave her when she was still in her marriage and that all that knowledge that she has now would have helped her save her marriage. She bemoaned her ignorance at the time. I was sad for her but was still grateful for her comment.
She made me realize that knowledge is everything and that timing is important. Knowledge at the right time is powerful and life saving.
Nonetheless we are human and cannot know everything. And even if we do know everything, and have applied all that we know, we still have flaws and cannot save everything, marriage included (a failing relationship/marriage can only be saved when the two parties are willing). That’s where God’s super-duper Grace comes in! Grace…we all need it, for in the end, though knowledge be important, it’s not all about knowledge.
God help us and our marriages that we will not live life with a belly full of regrets!
Mark Gadogbe (McApple)
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